And lo, it did come to pass that the non-trad did set out from his home, and traverse the miles. He did eat of the Steak N' Shake, and find a really decent, cheap motel in Elkhart, IN, and so it was that he was finished paying tolls for crappy roads and did settle back in rural New York.
And the school did begin, at the college on the "nice" side of the town, and as far as he could tell, he was appropriately registered and ready to rock. And thus did the study of blood commence.
And in that time of vacation, some modest events had transpired, and those stories would eventually be told on their own, but the main points were that the long-distance relationship was healthy and intact; the non-trad discovered he enjoyed single-malt Scotch; his mobile phone did plummet into an icy storm drain; and the chick from Friday karaoke with the book deal's book did indeed come out, and furthermore it did not suck. (Fuller review to follow, yo.)
And the Playstation football did recommence, and the non-trad found a very curious thing happening: a three-game winning streak. And thus was he moved to talk of the trash, as that is how the housemates did show their manly regard. And, it was good.